My schooling never touched on this pervasive disorder, yet my understanding of it cumulatively expanded through assisting clients who’d never been able to forge healthy, enduring attachments. Let me be very clear; I have not ‘treated’ Borderline Personality Disorder. Borderlines are not “bad people. In truth, when individuals are helped to resolve their self-worth issues, and connect with their emotions without compulsively analyzing or judging them, personality disorder features can be eliminated. It’s not ‘rocket science,’ but it definitely requires an unconventional and unique type of assistance, that falls outside the realm of standard or traditional therapies. Resolving Borderline Personality Disorder isn’t a head issue, and there is nothing wrong with a Borderline’s mind.
6 Signs of Narcissism You May Not Know About
Wednesday, February 6, Dating other sociopaths From a reader asking if it is a good idea for sociopaths to date other sociopaths: My reasons for thinking we’re a perfect match: We need a challenge; everyone else is just too easy to win over. When friends ask me how I do it, I shrug and say something banal because it is useless to try to explain.
The ease at which I get what I want can actually be frustrating.
If you date enough women, eventually you will encounter one with Borderline Personality Disorder. If autism is hyper-masculinization of the brain, it may help to think of BPD as characterizing hyper-feminization of the brain.
Much has been said about the tendency of Trump supporters to have more authoritarian personalities than the norm, and that is true, but why is authoritarianism so attractive to them? Why do they hate democracy? In fact, they love the idea of Trump having as much power as he desires which is unlimited as his need for power and adulation is insatiable , so he can push through his cruel and destructive agenda.
In Whitaker they see a tough, merciless enforcer. One of the group even posted a meme of Rosenstein as a 90 lb weakling getting sand kicked in his face by you guessed it an exaggeratedly muscled Whitaker who looked like he was pumped up on massive doses of steroids. This group was not all males. In fact the person who posted the meme was a woman. Far right paramilitary groups like the Proud Boys embody Trumpist hypermasculinity. I suspect most Trumpers had authoritarian fathers who demanded girls act like girls and boys act like boys.
Another Trump fan tweeted this in response: They find ways to spin his worst traits and most immature, childish, and cruel actions and statements into actual virtues and good deeds.
Why narcissists and borderlines are drawn to each other.
Relationships per se are difficult. Two individuals come together — attraction, lust, love, personality styles, personal and family histories, attachment, and lifestyles collide — and there you are in the middle of a daring, challenging, and steamy relationship. Remember we all have personality traits, which does not make us personality disordered. Notoriously famous personality disorders discussed in films, courts, and domestic disputes are all part of the dramatic-erratic cluster:
THE MALE BORDERLINE Surviving the Crash after your Crush. By Shari Schreiber, M.A. The following material was written for individuals trying to recover from a relationship that’s had toxic consequences for them, and is not intended as a support resource for Borderlines or anyone with BPD traits.
May 29, Abused Men: In the thread, forum members share their experiences of abuse and the abuse they have witnessed beloved brothers, sons and friends suffer. Abusive personalities typically follow similar patterns of behavior. Recently, more and more information is becoming available on male victims of abuse. Building the Perfect Mousetrap! Keep your Mask on at All Times.
When you first meet your new victim, tell him what a great guy he is. Tell him you admire his accomplishments. Bring out your fake self-confidence. Show him you are a resposible, rational, hard-working adult woman.
Hallmarks of narcissistic personality disorder
The reason this came up to begin with is that I was discussing whether certain people in on-line support groups might be dealing with something other than BPD. There are certain support groups in which women make up a large proportion of the group. This confused me a bit, because BPD is much more likely to be diagnosed in women, rather than men.
Hi Chump Lady, I’m 7 months out from D-Day year old chump, married 15 years with 2 sons. Some highlights I discovered My wife had multiple affairs throughout our marriage, including with someone that she hired on to work for my business.
Five Misconceptions That Keep Men From Letting Go and Moving On A breakup with a woman who engages in behaviors associated with BPD or borderline personality disorder during a romantic relationship may be one of the more painful experiences a man can go through. Many men report spending months and even years recovering from the fallout from this type of relationship.
For men whose romantic partners do not engage in the behavior pattern associated with BPD until after marriage, the going can be even tougher. Because of the difficulty many people have in understanding the true nature of these relationship breakups, many misconceptions about this disorder can arise. Most of these perceptions are based on our common belief system of why people behave the way they do. These assumptions, as understandable as they may be, if left unchallenged can easily lead someone trying to heal from one of these relationships to wrong conclusions.
Without clearing away these misperceptions it may be more difficult to gain the kind of understanding necessary to recover from this type of relationship. In this blog post we are going to address five common mistaken assumptions about the recovery process from a breakup with a woman with traits of borderline personality disorder. We tend to toss around psychological labels fairly casually.
But it is not really accurate to label a woman who is capable of functioning in her everyday life as having the disorder, even if she engages in some of these behaviors in her romantic relationships. Because the personality traits we are born with can be weak, strong, or anywhere in between, the severity of the genetic component that causes susceptibility to this disorder can vary. Therefore it is easiest to use the concept of an imaginary scale or spectrum when referring to BPD behaviors.
Women who have weaker traits may engage in less extreme behaviors associated with this disorder.
Working With Borderline Personality Disorder
Commentary on popular culture and society, from a mostly psychological perspective Sunday, June 18, Walking on Eggshells: Dealing with the Borderline in Your Life Many times, patients or others ask me for a recommendation for a book or help for dealing with an angry, destructive person who is ruining their emotional health.
My recomendation for a self-help book when coping with the aftermath of the borderline personality is Stop Walking on Eggshells: But first of all, what is a borderline and how do know if that is what you are dealing with? Certainly, one cannot diagnose someone without evaluating them, but many times, the descriptions people give me of their significant other, parent, child, or friend leads me to wonder if the advice seeker is dealing with a borderline.
There are even books on how to divorce a Borderline or Narcissistic Personality that give strategies to reduce the damage done to a person during the process.
Distortion Campaigns Not Limited to BPD Victims. People without BPD may practice vilification campaigns, also, but they are often tied to BPD or similar personality disorders, especially Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).
I have been scouring the research on BPD to find out if anyone in the research or therapeutic community uses this term or concept high-functioning versus low-functioning Borderline. I have yet to find any author in either the research community or therapeutic community reference this concept. The idea of high vs. The research community is comprised those scientists doing medical research and psychological research on BPD. They publish scholarly articles and research in medical and psychological journals.
This group of people does not differentiate between high-functioning and low-functioning BPs. In fact I have found no reference to high- or low-functioning BPD at all in any of these research papers or reports. Some very few also serve the families, friends, spouses, children, etc. Their purpose in life is to help the BP overcome or to effectively manage their disorder. In this group of people, I have found no mention of high- or low-functioning BPs. Marsha Linehan and Dr. John Gunderson are prominent individuals within the therapeutic community.
The final community is the support community. Mahari, the proprietors of bpd
Women With Traits of BPD
Narcissistic Traits A pervasive pattern of grandiosity in fantasy or behavior , need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five or more of the following: A pervasive pattern of grandiosity in fantasy or behavior , need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five or more of the following: He would actually get mad at me if I was sick.
Lack of empathy is one of the most striking features of people with narcissistic personality disorder. It’s a hallmark of the disorder in the same way that fear of abandonment is in borderline personality disorder. Narcissistic entitlement is not the same as self-worth; for example, that is, the belief that one is worthy of accomplishments.
A place where there are all sorts of amazing diagnoses to give people who rub you the wrong way. At the same time, though, having a framework can help you understand people who have semi-pathological traits and characteristics and can actually make it more tolerable to cope with these people. The diagnostic bible of psychiatry is the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual DSM , which is constantly being updated and revised.
So the following is accurate as of now, but may change when the new version of the Manual comes out. Cluster A — People with odd or eccentric characteristics. Cluster B — People who are dramatic, emotional or impulsive. Cluster C — People who are highly anxious and fearful. Someone with Schizotypal Personality Disorder will just sit in their room by themselves reading subversive books and ordering prayer rocks online, but a raging narcissist can make your life a living hell.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Perhaps my favorite disorder to diagnose in people who are difficult to deal with. Anytime you interact with someone who acts entitled, demanding and superior probably has narcissistic personality traits, if not the full blown disorder. As with all personality disorders, the different between someone with a mild case of asshole-ism versus the full-blown personality disorder is that someone with the personality disorder has such severe characteristics that they are impaired in interpersonal interactions and daily life.
Has a grandiose sense of self-importance e. Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love. Has a sense of entitlement, i.
Sociopath World: Dating other sociopaths
Every one of my boyfriends except for one, who was severely bipolar and my ex-husband were narcissists. I know a lot of other borderlines who say they have the same problem—they simply are not attracted to a man or woman who is not a narcissist. There are reasons why this happens. Cluster B disorders are all characterized at their root by problems establishing an identity early in childhood and integrity of the Self which causes people with these disorders to act out toward themselves or others in destructive ways and to have problems either accessing or developing prosocial emotions like empathy.
RULES of NO CONTACT. 1. To keep my sanity and totally end this relationship, I must maintain NO CONTACT. 2. No Contact includes every single form of contact with him/her.. 2a. This also includes NOT asking my friends/family about him/her and not letting friends/family tell me about him/her.
Aaron Kipnis Individuals with borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder may marry or enter into intimate relationships with each other, more than statistically likely, it seems. Although today treatment for BPD especially in the form of dialectic behavior therapy , can be extremely effective, not everyone gets treatment, and may not be aware of why they are attracted to people with NPD. Aaron Kipnis, a clinical psychologist and professor of psychology at Pacifica Graduate Institute, why he thinks this pairing occurs.
People with cluster B personality disorders can make it challenging for other people to be around them. Interactions and relationship with them can be pretty frustrating because they are usually very self- involved with little empathy for others. As a result, their lives can be lonely. Because people with BPD and NPD lack much insight into their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, it is often hard for them fully understand why others repeatedly abandon them.
But, people with Borderline Personality and Narcissistic Personality Disorders can find one another attractive and may actually forge more stable relationships with one another, at times, than they can with people without personality disorders.